It’s been quiet on here. I realize. I spent the past few days with my dad in the hospital, in Switzerland, holding his hand and telling him over and over how much I love him. Wish I would have done that more often sooner. Maybe you can?

Also, what’s a word that describes both heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time?

75 Comments leave a comment below

  1. The word is in your title. Life.

  2. Sending love xx

  3. Oh, I did the same with my dad 3 years ago. THIS is all there is. These moments. Hold their hands, tell them they are loved.

  4. ganz viel Liebe und Kraft für Deine Familie Tina <3

  5. The word is “life”.

  6. Best wishes to you with your dad in Switzerland. Wonderful that you are there. All strength and good for you. Best, Roger Ellman

  7. HOPE

    Sending you all our love

  8. Sending love. This photo is so full of love- from him to you and you to him. Went through this recently with my father and experienced the same feelings. Grace was the word that kept coming to me. There can be beauty in witnessing someone bridge worlds. Releasing them, our hearts can feel like they are expanding and contracting at the same time. Yet our loved ones never really leave us. One can have a rich, beautiful, heart expanding connection with a loved one after they transition. There is so much love for you here.

  9. oh – this is the most important thing we are here for – for our family, for our friends – for love, for life – wish you a lot of strength – these are sad moments with so much beauty.

  10. The important thing is that you’re there with him now. I hope you feel peace in knowing that. Much love.

  11. Sending you a big hug. You have brought so much joy to this world, he must be incredibly proud of you. x

  12. Fragile? Precious?

  13. charmolypi

  14. Walking your Dad home – a precious gift for both of you.
    Your Dad has been blessed even when you couldn’t be by his side. He has raised a beautiful human being in you. Through the medium of your blog you have spoken to thousands and me of warmth, generosity and joy. Journey through the grief with the confidence that love never ends.

  15. Viel Kraft dir und deiner Familie!

  16. My answer is “LIFE”….best wishes to you, your family. ?

  17. Lots of love to you and your family.

  18. Glennon Doyle Melton calls it ‘brutiful’.
    When life is brutal and beautiful in equal measure.

  19. SAUDADE: has been described as “the love that remains” after someone is gone. It is the recollection of feelings, experiences, places or events that once brought excitement, pleasure, well-being, which now trigger the senses and make one live again. It can be described as an emptiness, like someone that should be there in a particular moment is missing, and the individual feels this absence. It brings sad and happy feelings all together, sadness for missing and happiness for having experienced the feeling.

  20. You bring so much light to so many of us… sending love and hugs your way. I’m so sorry you’re going through this

  21. Glennon Doyle Melton’s “brutiful”

  22. The word that comes to mind is Pathos. I bid you peace at this difficult time.

  23. Poignant.

    Sending you love.
    May you know comfort.

  24. Your blog has been uplifting to me. Sending love and strength to you and your family.

  25. Your selections in your blog really help to understand life in a lovely way. I hope your dad will recover soon.. Sending you love…

  26. profound.

    “Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go”

    sending love.

  27. Bittersweet. <3

  28. We have a word in portuguese that is just that – Saudade.
    there is no translation possible. Is a feeling, is a longing, it is the ability of missing someone even if they are still in from of us.

    It is sadly during these times, when we see the fragility of our parents, that we see that they aren’t immortal and will not be here forever.

    I really know how you are feeling. hang in there.

  29. Sending you love!

  30. Glennon Doyle calls it ‘brutiful.’ Peace to you and your family.

  31. Being with your dad, in quietness – is beautiful.

  32. The word for me is “human.”

    Peace to you and your family.

  33. I guess it’s LOVE, in a way.
    You’re doing the right thing now. Don’t dwell on the past. Be free.

  34. Your dad is so lucky to have such a caring, compassionate, loving daughter — even if she does live across the pond. Blessings to you and your family. A sweet prayer to your dad.

  35. Sending strength––you are a loving daughter!

  36. Knowing he is leaving you on this planet to keep making it better, your father can go with a sense of peace surrounding his spirit. Love is undeniable. Sometimes, words are unnecessary.

  37. “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28–30)

  38. Simply, PRESENCE. Wishing you more.

  39. Sending love

  40. Oh ja … das war für mich vor zwei jahren auch das schlimmste, dieses „einfach-da-sein“, das aushalten der situation und meinen vater einfach begleiten und in liebe loslassen, alles was nicht so gut war, vergessen und einfach da-sein …. dankbar und liebend. Fühl dich umarmt!
    Alles liebe!

  41. Oh ja – viel zu selten können alle Beteiligten das zulassen – mein Papa ist so von “der alten Schule” ala “ein Indianer kennt keinen Schmerz” – und Gefühle zulassen kann er nur schwer, genauso wie er es schwer erträgt sie zu erleben. Und trotzdem – LIEBEn wir sie! Und das ist gut so!
    Viel Kraft und auch Freude für die kommende Zeit &
    Alles Liebe und Gute für euch!

  42. Oh you beautiful thing. Your Dad is a part of you and the love between you both will outlive us all. I am sending you love and strength and please know how much you mean to so many people near and far and we’re all gathered around you and hugging you tight xxxxx

  43. I went thru the same experience with my father ! Courage et hauts les cœurs !

  44. When my father was in the hospital (and, as it turned out, dying), I flew across the country to be with him. I was there for ten days and spent each day by his bedside. It was both oppressive and life affirming. I did not get a chance to say goodbye to my mother. But, I wanted this time to be different. On the last day, before flying home, I went to his bedside, knowing that I would not see him again. He was sleeping. As an artist and designer, I am observant. And, I took this chance to remember him by looking closely at him, moving from head to toe.

    When I left, as difficult as it was, I realized there was something very rich in what I had experienced. I had a difficult relationship with my father. But, I couldn’t deny how important that last look was.

    I hope things are looking up for your father.

  45. Sending you much love <3

  46. Sending love and peace to you and your family

  47. Sending you love and strength.

  48. I call that feeling bodhicitta. Traditionally it means enlightened mind, but I’ve heard Pema Chödrön describe it as extreme tenderness of the heart. When you feel the supreme tenderness and beauty of life.

    I send you and your family my best thoughts.

  49. Melancholy

  50. Sending love. You’re in our thoughts

  51. All my best to you and you family.

    Mercedes Sosa singing “Gracias ala Vida” is a good companion to the heatbreaking & beautiful.

  52. Il modo migliore di passare il proprio tempo, tenendo la mano del proprio padre, quando li lui ne ha più bisogno.
    Hai la mia stima.


  53. Much love and strength to you and your dad.

  54. Das ist für mich jetzt eIn trauriger
    und umso schönerer Moment.

    Alles, alles Gute!

  55. The best time to tell you love somebody, was yesterday. The next best time is today…

  56. L O V E.

    Just be love.

  57. The word that is both heartbreaking and beautiful …is “Life”

    I have been there… sending love

  58. So sorry, went thru this recently. It’s a gift for both of you that you are there.

  59. Courage

  60. Send you love!
    Thanks for sharing.

  61. Sending love to you and your family. You are an amazing woman Tina!

  62. I lived the same thing a few years ago with my grandma, holding her hand and saying goodbye. To this day sometime, when I think about heartbreak and beauty, I think about that day, I think about her.
    Maybe the only word possible is the name of the people we loved.

    Thank you for sharing, I hugged my family a little bit tighter today.
    I’m so very sorry, sending you love and hope from Italy.

  63. Dear Tina, lots of love and strength to you and your loved ones.

  64. I come to your blog often for a couple of years for a sprinkle of something interesting, uplifting and necessary. Thank you for sharing this moment too.

    I also think is your word is “saudades”. It is an inexplicable mix of love, happiness, loss, longing for more time, to go back in time, to make a present moment last longer, to replicate an specific point in time you deem precious only later. It makes you smile, it makes you tear up. You feel lucky, angry and grateful. With what ifs and with resolution. You can feel saudades for the little everyday things and the big ones. You are very lucky when you can express how much “saudades” you feel towards a person or a moment you can relive. When you feel it, it aches in every single cell of your body and you are at loss of words to describe how you are feeling. Because there is so much you want to say. I believe is a loving word, not a sad one as I believe you can only feel “saudades” for someone or a time that nourished and changed your soul.

  65. Both of you are lucky to have each other. I wish you peace on this journey.

  66. Vulnerable.

    It’s an unusually powerful state of being from my perspective, where you open the door to feeling – and being connected to – a moment, a person and a time that imprints itself on you forever.

    Wishing you and your family hope and healing.

  67. Sending love to you, your dad and entire family. What I have witnessed through life is that, the four walls of hospitals and waiting rooms has the most earnest,and loving words, intentions, and actions.

    Throughout life, you need to keep saying this, There is no right time for these words.There is only the time you say it and the time you wished you’d said it more.

  68. The Japanese must have a word for it! Wish I knew….